Our truth defines us. It's the very thing that makes us complete and gives us purpose in a world of so much diversity. It's a gift that all of us have to offer and one that can never be taken away. Truth, when valued at it's deepest core, is the one gem in all of us that opens our eyes to what matters most when the world at large struggles; it's a gift personalized for only us.

    I've learned so much in these past few years about embracing my inner truth that it has left me both grateful and helpless at the same time. As much as we adore a person who is capable of being themselves, it is exhausting. As rewarding as living a life completely dedicated around our own values and principles is, it can also be lonely and disheartening when the world around us isn't as welcoming.

   As wholesome as our inner truth may be, it is a scary place to put ourselves in at first. I used to live my life in a bubble protected by my fears of expressing myself emotionally and it wasn't until I was fed up with the toxic patterns repeating in my life - that I let my truth be known; to my partner, friends and relatives, coworkers even. It shook me from within and left my mind racing, but I felt lighter knowing that I had made my mark on the world and more confident .

    After years of struggling to coexist with my own inner truth, I have now learned to accept it because in doing so - I would be accepting myself. I realized that the more I resisted being true to myself, the more toxic scenarios would appear in my life. That's when it became clear to me; it wasn't my situation that was toxic, it was my inability to utilize my truth that was. It was my fear of going against the grain.

   You know when people have an a-ha moment - the world appears brighter to them and it starts to make sense? Well, when I started to utilize my own truth - for small things like confronting my landlord for maintenance or being direct with a manager about what is and isn't working -  I too started to see the world through a brighter lens. Sure, it was still scary to put myself in those situations because I was vulnerable to rejection or someone else's judgement, but at least I was myself and that's all I needed for my life to increase in value. 

    Facing my truth helped me improve my life on so many levels. It helped me find better jobs, improved my relationships - even if it meant letting some go, I ate healthier, devoted myself to my passions, made peace with my own pains, and it allowed me to empower myself so that I could pursue my dreams. It's not easy discovering who we really are - but it's a side of us that will make way for a life dedicated to giving back to us.

    Instead of sacrificing our happiness for convenience; we endure the pain and fears of doing what feels right. Instead of letting our jobs and career get the best of us; we commit ourselves to our passions. Instead of always saying no, yes, or nothing at all; we try the opposite and do so with conviction. Instead of letting yourself endure toxic relationships; stand your ground and voice your standards. If you don't speak your truth or try, someone will lead you on with their own truth, regardless of if it resonates with you or not.

    At the end of the day, we have to look out for ourselves and our inner truth is a great place to start. By letting yourself shine with your greatness, you create a space in this world for you to live comfortably without restrictions. Once you accept yourself for all you have to offer, you free yourself from any fears and you become limitless.

    So take a chance and find your inner truth; you will love what you find.

Until next time! xoxo - Sarah

 Every year, Dimitar and I try to go camping. We first started camping several years ago and since then, we can both now say we can start a fire; our first time trying left us with no firewood - so funny! This year however, because of the move and settling in, we just haven't been able to consider going. Since the weather is getting colder, and we really missed the experience of being outdoors, we made our reservations at our favorite park and began to prepare for our trip.

Our camping gear - we still forgot some items

    Our reservation were for two nights. Originally we were going to stay one night because of the piggies and the cold, but after some arrangements we made, we decided on two nights. We pulled out all of our camping gear from the storage and organized everything; I even made a list, but deep down, I knew we'd forget something; we always do. Since camping is often gritty and testing of ones simplicity, I baked a pizza for us to enjoy for dinner. Since I wanted to have soup while there, I chopped up some vegetables and prepared a seasoning so that I could make the soup once we arrived. I was so excited!

   Before leaving for the park, we had to go grocery shopping to stock the cooler with goodies; I wasn't going to do a keto diet while camping since the weekend was normally my time to splurge which I was very much looking forward to. After our shopping, which took awhile, we finally went to the park and checked ourselves in. Also, both my phone and my camera batteries were both charged before leaving and all of the batteries ended up dyeing; so weird since this happened the majority of the trip!

    We arrived at Pohick Bay Park and checked in at about 4 o'clock; pretty late since the sun goes down around that time! We also picked up our firewood before making our way to our campsite and figured out that for winter time, it's best to get at least four to six  bundles of firewood for two nights. Dimitar and I have written down the best camp sites throughout the park and every year we always try to go to different ones; this year we picked #56. 

Pohick Bay Family Campground & Park

    Since the sun was close to setting, we tried to be diligent. We managed to put up the tent quickly but it was setting up the fire that took the longest and was the hardest to maintain since our memory on how to arrange the firewood was a bit faint. By the time we had the fire going, the sun was completely down, and it looked like we were in a Blair Witch Project movie! So creepy.

    We stayed up late that night pigging out on smores, pizza, and listening to christmas music; after that we then listened to ghost stories which didn't help after me talking about the Blair Witch Project movie. It was also pretty cold and neither Dimitar and I wanted to leave the fire so we stayed up for as long as the fire stayed burning; about 11pm. 

    When the fire burnt out, we both hit the tent. We had a new camping bag that we were excited to try out, SleepInGo, and many people reviewed that it had a decent insulation rating for colder seasons. Well, even though it was very spacious, I had to wear multiple layers to stay warm the entire trip, including 3 socks, 2 layers of clothing, a hat, and a fleece blanket on top of us; it wasn't fun but it kept us warm. Of course, this was all probably due to the fact that our tent wasn't winter friendly and had mesh walls, so we've made a reminder to get a new tent!

    

Our tent with top off - not winter friendly!

    

    That night I woke up with a kink in my neck and had weird dreams that left me waking up crying; so weird! Dimitar had to stop by the apartment to check on the piggies and to also get some of the items that we forgot; the canopy, can opener, our camping pillows, and a pot to cook my soup in. The whole process took about 40 mins. While Dimitar was gone, I entertained myself by doing my makeup, vlogging around the campgrounds, and reading. It was so peaceful to hear the crows around me chatting away as I read my new favorite novel, "Circe," by Madeline Miller.

Comfort Station

Hand Washing Area

Left: Stalls | Right: Showers

    When Dimitar returned, I put the soup on the fire and warmed up his beans; the weather really improved at this point and everything around us became orange, it was so magical! Since I was making my soup from scratch, I had to wait 40 mins for my soup to cook but I was able to sit back and admire nature's beauty and let myself be grounded. Fall is my favorite time of the year because of all the colors and it was surreal to be surrounded by it all. Nature is one of the purest gifts that one can immerse themselves in and it's everywhere for us to enjoy.

Waiting for my soup!

    After I ate - finally - we geared up for a trail walk and drove to the trail entrance which was only a few yards away from our campsite. At this point my phone and camera both died on me so I was left to use Dimitar's phone; it made me wonder if there was a ghost around because my batteries just wouldn't stay charged! 

    

Beautiful trails

    We got back at the camp site just in time to cut more firewood and start the fire before the sun went down. As a treat, we made ourselves more smores because... why not? The fire we made this time around was so much better too and lasted the entire night without going out; all we needed was a fresher upper. We first had our charcoal bits on the bottom, then small wood shavings laid out on top, small sticks afterwards, and then the large logs to top it off. It was a great "formula," that kept us pretty warm! Whenever the flames died down, we simply added more sticks or logs to it to keep it going which did the trick. 

Our best camp fire

Warm and cozy

    We ended the night telling each other ghost stories that we made up before going to sleep; it was a much colder night because of the wind, but we both managed. That following morning, we woke up around 8am to pack since check out time was around 11am. It was sad to leave since it felt like time had gone by so fast, but we both appreciated our small get-away. We knew next time we were going to go camping, that we would be better prepared for colder weather, and stay much longer.

    

Camping in November

    To watch my complete experience going camping, watch my vlog below from my YouTube channel!

   

Until next time! xoxo - Sarah

   

    I was having a rough day the other day and it made no sense; on the good side, I've lost some weight all thanks to my semi-strict keto dieting, but on the down side, I felt very moody and tired. Nothing seemed to cheer me up either except the thought of sweets; go figure. That's when it hit me that I must be close to starting my period because every time I have these weird and unexplainable mood swings - bam - my period marches in.  So, while Dimitar and I were out buying a few things like; hay for the guinea pigs, bathroom cleaner, lighter for the candles, and other things that I can't remember - we decided to make a stop at Krispy Kreme.

                                                 *Not Sponsored*

       Now, I haven't had Krispy Kreme in so long; probably in over a decade or more. Dimitar also has never tried their doughnuts so even though I was on my keto diet, I couldn't be bothered with the way that I was feeling. As soon as we stepped in, I instantly remembered that Krispy Kreme made their doughnuts on the spot and the customers could watch. The smell of the shop was so amazing that all of my problems were literally left at the door. 

    As Dimitar and I watched the doughnuts roll on the conveyor belt and get coated with their iconic glaze, it occurred to me that Krispy Kreme has such an inviting experience to offer their customers. Everyone likes doughnuts, but not everyone gets to watch them be made! There are only a few doughnut shops in the area that stick out to me but when it comes to glazed doughnuts, Krispy Kreme always tops it. 

Doughnuts made on the spot!

    We ordered only glazed doughnuts; with one raspberry filled of course for my boyfriend. Since we were the only ones there, we chatted in their lobby at one of the booth tables. Being there reminded me of when I was little and my dad would take me to this exact location as a nice treat; it was so fun and of course, delicious. As time has progressed, it's really nice to still see Krispy Kreme still thriving and bringing it's vintage vibes along with it!

So many doughnuts!

    

Yummy

My heart doughnut

    I devoured my two doughnuts in an instant; it was great and I have no idea how it happened either. Dimitar and I took some more photos since it was our first time going to Krispy Kreme in so long; at least for me it was. It was a very satisfying experience indeed, even if temporary; that's a ladies period for ya'.

Hot & Fresh indeed

    I didn't have plans to make this into a blog post because it's pretty random, but I thought it would be funny to write about the rough patches of a ladies' period and the cravings that consume us afterwards. Plus, I thought I'd share my night adventures with you all at the one and only, Krispy Kreme. Yum.

    

Until next time! xoxo - Sarah

    

    

    With my previous pancake making skills on my side, I used a 1/4 measuring cup for my pancakes and had my skillet on the lowest heat setting. I poured the batter into the skillet and waited for the bubbles to appear before flipping. Well, apparently I did not wait long enough because as I tried to flip the pancake, it fell apart completely even though the pancake looked well cooked. I was so confused. This was my first attempt and it was upsetting. 

    In all honesty, it took me three tries to figure out these pancakes. I tried one of the pancakes that I managed to make normally and I loved the taste; I just could not understand how to cook them! The third time was much better though and while I ended up wasting a lot of the pancake mix simply trying, it was worth it. 

    The trick for these pancakes to come out just right is to make them small so that it's easier to flip them. Next, wait two minutes before trying to flip them; I actually timed myself and it took two minutes and eleven seconds to be exact. It's important to wait long enough because the ingredients in this pancake mix do not cook as fast as a regular pancake mix would. Also, before flipping, I ended up sliding my spatula under the sides of the pancakes just to lift the pancake up so that I could make sure it wasn't stuck to the pan and this helped greatly. 

    

     Confidence is a touchy subject for me. You either have it, or it needs improvement. You either shine despite your fears or you stay in the shadows, letting your potential pass you by. Confidence isn't taught in school - a class I would have really appreciated, along with self-development. Truth is, our confidence actually starts at such a pivotal point in our lives, where we're learning how to take our first baby steps. When our undeveloped bones and muscles bear our weight for the first time; each attempt leading to more strength and less falls.

    I believe heavily that our home life as children determines greatly the outcome of a child's mindset and future. If you nurture your child with the right environment and give them opportunities to socialize, introduce them to new activities, having thought provoking conversations with them to develop their critical thinking, love them openly, and listening to them to show that their opinion is valuable - all of this plays an important role in our confidence because I myself didn't have much of that and it was a struggle I endured for majority of my adolescent years.

    I've opened up about my home life a bit in my previous post on a mindset for success, where I shared how I needed to reprogram myself completely from my own upbringings so that I could have better odds with success. It's not an easy process for anyone in need of reprograming themselves, but once accomplished, it's absolutely worth it. It wasn't until I was in my early 20's that I worked on my self-development and it took about five years for me to see drastic improvements. This is why our home life from a very young age really matters; it has a domino effect on children like it did for me.

8 year old me

    Here's an idea of how bad my confidence was; I ate for comfort - so I became overweight and stayed that way majority of my youth, I was bullied at school because of my weight, I fought a lot with my sister - both physically and verbally, I never made an effort to make friends and when I did - I was too afraid to be myself, I lived in my head a lot because I saw my parent's doing the same which lead to a lot of tension in our household, I didn't care about school because it didn't interest me which made me wonder if I was intellectually impaired, and last but not least, I had no idea how to embrace my feminine side because my mother wasn't around much to give us the love or attention my sisters and I desperately needed. 

It was hard.

    I truly felt like a character out of the book, A Series of Unfortunate Events, where everything kept falling apart and happiness was only brief. Despite everything though, I kept my head up and recalled many times where I persevered. Deep down, I always had a feeling within me that refused to give into the chaos around me. I refused to become a victim or let life beat me down. I had no idea what confidence was for the longest, but looking back now, I'm starting to think that it's a mixture of strength and hope; the best remedy yet.

Lost 25 lbs doing keto for 2 months

    As I matured and began to live independently, I began to see what confidence really meant to me. Confidence helped me fly to another state and live in an hotel until I found my first apartment; from there I waited months before I finally found a decent job. Confidence was me reaching out to try online dating when I had no idea what to expect, yet it led me to finding my life partner. Confidence was starting my own YouTube channel when my art skills weren't the best, where I became a great artist after five years of pure dedication. Confidence was trying special diets like juicing and keto for months, losing more weight than I had ever done before, leaving me looking and feeling my best.   

    The more I put myself into the world, the more the world gave back to me. The more I faced my fears, the more I was willing to try. The harder life became, the easier it became for me to stand tall with my head held high. As I grew up, my ability to believe in myself became more obvious and the more I tuned into what my heart really wanted, the more love I began to feel for myself. It felt like true freedom, it just took me so long to realize the power was in my hand's.

    Maybe that's confidence after all; loving yourself enough to always do what's right for you, even if you don't know the outcome.

Dyed my hair blonde for the first time!

 The best thing about confidence is that everyone has it; it just needs to be used.

Until next time! xoxo - Sarah

  People are a product of their environment; they are either nurtured or conditioned being molded by society and those around them. A little psychology and philosophy on this matter will confirm this. This leads me to todays article, one I am very passionate about; a mindset for success.

    I grew up in a chaotic and unpredictable household. There was often tension between my parents or my sister and I would fight because of this. As a child with little to say or do about the circumstances that were thrown at me, I often had a lot of pent up frustration that only carried on with me as I grew up. 

    When I became an adult, I knew better to completely reprogram myself because I knew I had many beliefs that just weren't mine. I was insecure, overweight (at least I thought I was even when I wasn't), not use to my own feminism, unsure about building relationships, and overall lived a good amount of time in my head. As I grew into my independence though and put myself into situations where I had to back myself up, I realized there was so much for me to work on and even more to learn.

Instagram photo 2013

    My self-development journey officially started after I met my partner, Dimitar. I was going through a tough time of not finding a job and just moving in with my boyfriend's parents that it led me to do a lot of soul searching. In the time of me looking for a job, I read a lot of books to take my mind off of my worries and focused heavily on new age concepts such as the law of attraction.

   I even read books on scientific studies that were done on patients who exhibited optimistic attitudes of their overall health condition versus those who were more negative. I watched documentaries on energy and water and how the two went hand in hand to determine our own mental and physical well-being. I even read empowering books such as Viktor Frankl famous book, "Man Searching For Meaning," which greatly shaped my mindset.

    Within two years or so of being dedicated to my self-development, I was able to filter out my negative thoughts and even recognize self-sabotage acts before they kicked in. Here is what I learned in the process:

    Take the time to listen to yourself, care for yourself, and love yourself. Be your own friend because the child in you is counting on you.

3. Reprogram Yourself 

    Release yourself from past beliefs and feelings that others or yourself, threw onto you. Read self-help books, watch documentaries, meet new people, try new activities, develop a new routine, eat healthier or workout more, etc. Make an effort to find out who you really are without the extra baggage.

4. Grow Your Passions

    What do you think about the most? What makes you feel like a child again? What makes you lose track of time? Find your hidden passion and bring it to life; there are more answers there than you realize.

5. Smile

    Let your smile be your strength and let it shine wherever you go.

   6. Develop A Routine

    Fill your day with small tasks that will empower you. As you bring your passions to life, work your daily routine around it so your day is fulfilling. Make your routine fun and personalized to fit your needs.

7. Journal Often

    Every week or month make time to journal about your experiences. It will be a time where you can release any emotions weighing you down or gain more perspective. One day, years later, you can read your journals and realize how much you've grown.

8. Listen To Your Intuition - Not Your Emotions 

    Emotions can be misleading but truth will always stand tall. Be honest with yourself and follow your gut instincts first. Pursue what you want and let go of what no longer serves you.

9. It's Okay To Cry

If you need to cry, cry. Don't hold the pain in just for it to grow even more. Release your pain naturally and then move on with confidence. 

10. Pamper Yourself

Spoil yourself every month and make time to do it regularly. You really do deserve the finer things in life.

Until next time! xoxo - Sarah